


Chérie

by orphan_account



Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Eddsworld Reverse AU, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Mentions of Edd - Freeform, Paultryck if you squint very hard, Talk of Guns because it’s Tord what do you expect from me, This fandom is so dead on this site, Tragedy of Paul’s Life (Ft. “Get Pat away from me before I slaughter him”), Very brief mentions of Tom and Matt, i literally can’t find any fluff for these characters it’s all smt I just want friendship please—, reverse au, they’re mentioned once and they aren’t even named whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 08:14:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16082099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It’s movie night, and sometimes things get out of hand.





	Chérie

—

 

Movie nights were always.. _Interesting_ , to say the least.

 

On one hand, they were usually able to decide on a movie unanimously. On the other, Patryck and Paul rarely paid attention to the movie, and would instead host competitions to see who could fit the most popcorn into their mouths. (Paul was on a winning streak of fourteen-to-three.) So it didn’t really matter what movie Tord chose to watch, because by the end of the night, he would be the only one awake.

 

No, that was a lie. Paul would be awake too. Pat wouldn’t, though. The yellow-clad male would be long since asleep, face pressed against one of their sides. It was.. Well, _cute_.

 

As cute as someone who acted like his dad half the time could be, at least.

 

And that’s how it was now.

 

The movie was ending, the final scene starting, and Tord was very, _very_ tense. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen the movie before; No, he’d seen it multiple times in the last week. But it was a good movie, and going back to rewatch it always made him catch something he’d missed. He was pressed against the left side of the couch, a blanket pulled up on top of his head as he watched with wide eyes.

 

On the other side of the couch was Paul, who was, slowly but surely, making a dent in the popcorn bowl on the arm of the couch. Pat lay sprawled out in between the two, eyes shut and head resting in Paul’s lap.

 

“We’ve seen this movie, like, nine times.” Paul said, voice as scratchy as usual thanks to the constant appearance of a cigarette tucked in the corner of his mouth. “Why can’t we watch something different?”

 

Tord gasped, lifting one hand to press against his chest in a show of dramatics. “You didn’t.” He said, mock hurt splashing into his voice. “How dare you? This is such a _good movie, Paul._ ”

 

One bushy eyebrow rose doubtfully in response. “Yeah?”

 

“Is he _actually_ asleep?” Tord asked, changing the subject to nod down at their dark-haired companion.

 

“Mhm,” Paul made an agreeing noise in the back of his throat.

 

“Noo,” Pat whined, tugging the blanket up to his nose as he rolled over, practically smushing his face into Paul’s stomach. His voice came out muffled. “They stole my donutsss..”

 

Tord snorted, shifting slightly to lower the volume on the tv. “We had donuts?”

 

“Yes,” Pat’s voice came back in a sullen sort of tone. “The elves, the elves took my donuts.”

 

Someone on the tv screamed and Tord lowered the volume again. “Does this always happen?”

 

“Weird nightmares?” Paul raised his eyebrows and shrugged. Hell if he listened to their roommate half the time. Patryck was _exhausting_ to listen too for long periods of time. “I don’t know. Should I?”

 

Tord shrugged, the movement causing the blankets he’d piled on himself to shift a bit.

 

“‘M still awake, y’know,” Pat’s voice was tired and almost sad sounding as he rolled over again, on his back as he stared at the ceiling, eyes half-lidded. “‘can hear what you’re saying.” He added, voice hoarse.

 

“Go the fuck to sleep.” Paul said, playing with the other male’s hair. It was _soft_ and _in his lap_ , he may as well, right?

 

Pat made an angry huffing sound, settling into the blankets once more. “ _You_ go the fuck to sleep.” He answered, voice muffled by the copious amount of blankets piled on top of him.

 

“I _will._ ”

 

_“Good.”_

 

Tord, attention back on the movie reached his hand into the popcorn bowl to take a handful. “You sound pretty fuckin’ gay, Patryck.”

 

Pat let out an indignant sputtering noise, fighting to free himself from the blankets, and Paul muttered what sounded like an ancient curse under his breath.

 

It was nice, being able to lounge around and laugh without worrying about the Green Army.

 

Ah, the Green Army. Run by none other than Edd, their ex-roommate and ex-best friend. With his second in command (a terrifyingly skilled sniper) and third in command (a surprisingly strong medic), Edd was certainly an interesting character, with soft eyes and an even softer voice.

 

Or, _previously soft voice_. Nowadays it seemed rough and scratchy, though it _did_ still hold a gentle lilt to it.

 

Maybe Edd wasn’t completely gone.

 

But maybe it was okay if Edd wasn’t going to come back, Tord thought to himself as he watched Pat attempt to suffocate Paul with a pillow, both of them on the floor now as they struggled for control of the pillow. Not like Edd would be welcomed back into their house after he _literally fucking blew it to pieces._ Tord wasn’t so eager to see him anytime soon.

 

The final scene ended and the credits began to roll just as Paul managed to turn the tides and clamp a pillow down on Pat’s face, leaving the yellow-clad male to kick and flail in a last ditch effort to free himself from the pillow.

 

Yeah. Who needs Edd when you have two cool friends?

 

Tord had everything he needed in the room with him.

 

If they survived, at least.

 

—

 

The living room was quiet, oh so quiet now. The tv was powered off and the remote lay discarded on the coffee table. The bowl of popcorn rested on the small table as well, and so did Tord’s mug of hot chocolate.

 

Tord wasn’t sure he was the only one awake.

 

Paul was pressed against the arm of the couch, a few pillows propped between him and the back of the couch. Pat was cuddled up against him, swaddled in blankets like a child. Both of them were breathing softly, though Paul’s breathing had a sort of edge to it, probably thanks to all of the smoking he did.

 

Tord rolled his eyes and shifted so his back was pressed against the arm of the couch, reaching out to jab Pat. “Pat. Hey, Patty.”

 

To his credit, Patryck was certainly stubborn. He lifted one hand, flipped the red-hooded boy off, and then rolled over to curl into a tighter ball. Okay. So Pat was awake.

 

“Paul. Paul. Paul. _Paul._ ”

 

No answer.

 

“‘M going to run away and join the green army.”

 

No response.

 

“I’m going to blow up the town.”

 

Still no response.

 

“.. I’m going to dump your cigarettes in the sink.”

 

Paul moved immediately, lifting one foot to kick Tord’s legs off the coffee table. “Don’t you _fucking dare._ That already happened last week.”

 

Ah, they were both awake. _Perfect._

 

“So can we watch another movie? Look, we can rent _‘Insane Zombie Pirates From Hell Five’_ now!” He said, flipping through the channels on the screen. One of them landed on a horror movie and someone on the screen screamed.

 

He’d forgotten how high the volume had been. _Loud enough to wake the dead._

 

The reaction was immediate.

 

Tord nearly spasmed the couch, knocking his mug of now-cold hot chocolate off the table, along with the bowl of popcorn. Paul slammed his ankle against the bottom of the couch and let out a string of colorful words, while Pat launched himself backward off the couch and hit the floor with a thud.

 

 _“Fuck,”_ Paul groaned, rubbing his ankle as Tord frantically lowered the volume, rubbing his forehead. “ _Fuck._ ” He repeated.

 

“Fuck,” Tord agreed, slipping off the couch to sweep the popcorn back into the bowl with his hands. “Sorry.”

 

It was quiet for a few moments, apart from Paul’s soft cursing.

 

And then Pat appeared again, leaning over the back of the couch. “Hey,” He said in the highest voice Tord had ever heard, batting his eyelashes in an almost aggressive manner. “I am going to hack the radios so they only ever play ‘sunshine lollipops’ over and over and over again.” He said sweetly, honestly, threateningly.

 

“Please _doN’T—_ “

 

Pat just flipped him off again and marched out of the room and up the stairs to his bedroom.

 

Tord turned wide, distressed eyes on the other male in the room. “Tell him he’s being unreasonable.” He begged, clasping his hands together in mock-prayer. “Please, Paul.”

 

And Paul, the _traitor_ , just shrugged. “Nah,” He gruffed, standing and collecting a few blankets in his arms. “Goodnight, Tord.”

 

“Night, Pau.” Tord said, accepting his fate as Paul ruffled his hair, further messing up its usual oddly spiked style.

 

Paul rolled his eyes and vanished up the staircase, making his way to his own bedroom.

 

The quiet gave Tord the perfect opportunity for self-reflection.

 

He thought he’d come a long way. Since Edd’s betrayal he’d learned to trust his roommates— no, his _friends_ — more, opening up a bit more too. Sure, he still kept all of his guns (and he knew for a fact that Paul had kept the harpoon that had shot Edd out of the sky), but it wasn’t like he had had the opportunity to use them since then. Which was a shame, in his opinion. Everything was better with guns. Guns and hentai. They made his life so, _so_ much better.

 

And he’d accepted that Edd wasn’t ever coming back, which was nice too. At least now he wasn’t constantly checking his phone for any texts from _‘redcolacock’_.

 

(Yes, that was the alleged Green Leader’s name in his contacts. Redcolacock.)

 

He felt pretty indifferent about the whole situation now. Sure, he would’ve gladly gone back in time and _slaughtered_ Edd, but it was in the past. He’d never have to see Edd again, right?

 

_Wrong._

 

The answer to his question came that very same night.

 

Upstairs he could hear Pat and Paul talking softly in the hallway, and he could practically hear all of Pat’s hand movements.

 

And then his phone chimed.

 

Tord reached for it, clicking on the home button to turn it on.

 

One message, from redcolacock.

 

_‘Have a good movie night, Tord?’_

 

He pressed his finger on the power button and shut it down, slamming it onto the coffee table.

 

_“— can’t believe you—“_

 

_“That’s ridiculous, what an awful movie.”_

 

_“YOU’RE ridiculous.”_

 

_“Creative. You’re really a—“_

 

He couldn’t hear anymore as his mind faded to static and he stared at his phone.

 

How had he known?

 

_How had he known?!_

 

He wasn’t even aware there was anybody around him until someone put their hand on his shoulder and he jumped, nearly kicking them away.

 

But it was just Paul, eyes wide. “You okay?” The pink-hooded male asked, resting one hand on Tord’s shoulder.

 

And Tord?

 

He smiled and nodded. “Just thinking about the movie. Can you imagine all the different possibilities for endings? A nice, _steamy_ scene at the end? _Oooooh_..”

 

Paul looked _so disappointed_ , dropping his hand away from his shoulder, marching away while muttering something that sounded suspiciously like _‘I can’t believe I was ACTUALLY fuckin’ worried,—‘._

 

Tord watched his friend walk away before eyeing his phone again.

 

After a few minutes he picked it up, swiped to open the message, turned his ‘read message’ notification on, and left redcolacock on read.

 

That was one way to be petty.

 

He stood, cracked his back, and trudged up the stairs toward his own bedroom.

 

He passed Paul and Pat’s rooms on his way to his own. Both the doors were shut, though Paul’s was cracked open a bit. He wasn’t the best sleeper in general, at least now he could sneak downstairs whenever he wanted without having to actually _open_ the door.

 

He slipped into his own room, yanked back the covers, and threw himself into his bed. His phone lay discarded on the floor beside his bed.

 

Oh well.

 

Even from his room, with the covers up to his ears and several semi-automatic rifles stored under his bed, he couldn’t feel safe. Not yet.

 

Down the hall he could hear Paul shuffling around in his room and Pat humming. Could hear Paul knocking on the wall and yelling at Pat to _shut the fuck up_ , and could hear Pat let out a shriek in response.

 

If Edd was really able to see what they were doing, then _fine._ Tord promised himself he was going to offer his friends hugs constantly. Might as well make Edd sit through that, since the brunette obviously didn’t have anything better to do.

 

_“My god, shut up!”_

 

_“YOU shut up!”_

 

_“Patryck I swear to god I’ll come over there and break your phone, don’t test me.”_

 

_“Fuck you, you’re not my mom!”_

 

If Edd really wanted to watch them, fine. Paul and Pat were golden on their own anyway.

 

Feeling a bit more content and safe, Tord slid further into his blankets, further into the comforting warmth of his bed, and let his eyes drift shut.

 

_He had all that he needed right here._

**Author's Note:**

> I can’t decide if I like Short!Pat or Tall!Pat so his height is up in the air for this, do whatever you want. 
> 
> This was AwFUL I’m sorry ajdkaldk
> 
> I might continue it but probably not?? This was more like a piece I worked on in between classes instead of homework and also the other fic I’m supposed to be working on iM SORRY—


End file.
